18 Seriously Good Tweets Only Women Will Get

1.

Jess
@jessokfine

When someone says “women like you” to me, I assume they’re referring to extremely powerful wizards.

06:58 PM – 08 Jun 2016
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2.

maddie
@moscaddie

*wipes doritos dust onto cum-stained sweatpants* hmmmmm time to pick out a flawless wife on the internet. not rihanna her forehead’s too big

12:48 PM – 07 Jul 2015
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3.

4.

Aparna Nancherla
@aparnapkin

DID U KNO: women developed passive aggressiveness as a way to combat society’s aggressive passiveness toward treating them like equal humans

09:05 PM – 26 Aug 2016
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5.

Frankie
@phranqueigh

I’m just a girl, standing in front of a boy, b/c I didn’t immediately get out of his way as he was walking towards me & now he’s perplexed.

12:00 AM – 25 Aug 2016
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6.

Morgan Murphy
@morgan_murphy

they should do a female version of having all the jobs and money and power.

06:44 PM – 28 Jun 2016
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7.

Julieanne Smolinski
@BoobsRadley

I don’t use social media or apps to date because I’m in my 30s and I prefer meeting men the old fashioned way: never.

05:01 PM – 17 Jun 2016
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8.

beth loves cake, so
@bourgeoisalien

First date tip: Laugh at all his jokes, even bad ones. Men love it. Laugh louder. If he begs you to stop…laugh harder. This is good advice

02:26 AM – 07 Apr 2016
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9.

Megan Amram
@meganamram

places where it’s scary to be a woman: outside, inside, on the internet, in real life, driving, walking, on the bus, at work, at school, at

11:39 PM – 24 Aug 2016
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10.

ktkins
@voldemortsbicep

dudes make fun of girls for liking pumpkin spice, uggs and the kardashians as if craft beer, cargo shorts and fantasy football are real cool

09:17 PM – 25 Aug 2016
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11.

12.

????
@Sassafrantz

Some guy just asked if I was Asian cuz he’s China get in my pants. Hope your day is as magical as mine.

01:19 PM – 04 Oct 2016
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13.

Anna Drezen
@annadrezen

Beyonce smiling next to Chris Martin is every woman who’s ever had to momentarily dim her shine to work alongside a mediocre man #SB50

01:41 AM – 08 Feb 2016
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14.

Megan Amram
@meganamram

A man mansplaining another man = Manception

01:26 AM – 05 Oct 2016
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15.

OhNoSheTwitnt
@OhNoSheTwitnt

“Nobody cares,” typed the guy who cared so little he took time out of his day to reply “nobody cares” to my free joke on the internet.

04:58 PM – 13 Nov 2014
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16.

Meg Monk-Sproul
@MegMonk

Like a gender reveal but instead of eating pink or blue cake you smash a piggy bank to reveal $1 if it’s a boy or 78 cents if it’s a girl

06:55 PM – 18 Mar 2016
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17.

Nina Bargiel
@slackmistress

If street harassers really wanted to “rock my world” they’d pay my mortgage.

06:47 PM – 25 Jan 2016
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18.

Sophia Benoit
@1followernodad

guys: women are a mystery.
women: Here is what we-
guys: LITERALLY WHAT DO THEY WANT?
women: well for start-
guys: Guess we’ll never know!

10:45 PM – 04 Dec 2015
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